Search found 15 matches

by Bob Writer
Fri Sep 07, 2018 10:58 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Discussion: Q3 Volume 35
Replies: 341
Views: 24042

Re: Discussion: Q3 Volume 35

Dear Sir, It was late and almost dark on the 30th June when I managed to find a post box in my hometown of Upper Longstocking, and send my manuscript on its way across the pond. My wife was none too pleased, I can tell you. She'd sent me out for milk and a Tunnock's teacake. By the time I managed to...
by Bob Writer
Sun Aug 06, 2017 5:11 am
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir,

Like this thread, I shall never die!

Yours in long life,

Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.)

p.s. - That Tina seems like a nice young lass. For a Colonial.
by Bob Writer
Wed Jun 11, 2014 11:06 pm
Forum: Publishing: The Business Of
Topic: Success!
Replies: 4045
Views: 874191

Re: Success!

Dear Sir,

Congratulations to Miss Dawn, Master David, Master David, and Master Preston.

That hack, that lame excuse for a writer Cameron, can just sod off.

Yours writingly,

Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.)

p.s. – He still owes me money from the settlement, you know.
by Bob Writer
Fri Feb 28, 2014 11:12 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir, I think I may have fractured my arm. I have rung for the Doctor, and he assures me an ambulance is on the way. I have now come out of the cupboard, although I believe you Americans may call it a closet. My wife found me eventually. A woman like that doesn’t give up easily. When I saw her s...
by Bob Writer
Thu Feb 27, 2014 5:04 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir, I am angry, but that is nothing compared to the outrage my wife is currently displaying. She has smashed all our crockery, she has broken the coffee table in our living room, and from where I am hiding in the cupboard under the stairs I believe she may have started on our bedroom. Her hob-...
by Bob Writer
Tue Jan 07, 2014 2:42 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir,

Thank you so much for your kind regards, alhough I must admit to not remembering much of what occurred on Boxing Day. I seem to have blacked out.

Yours sincerely,

Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.)

p.s. - I have mentioned that my wife was the Battalion boxing champion, haven't I?
by Bob Writer
Thu Jan 02, 2014 7:46 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir,

Happy New Year.

Yours hungoverly,

Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.)

p.s. - What year is it? Is Mr. Churchill still Prime Minister?
by Bob Writer
Tue Nov 05, 2013 3:50 pm
Forum: Publishing: The Business Of
Topic: Different Methods of Writing
Replies: 14
Views: 3397

Re: Different Methods of Writing

Dear Sir, There is only one manner in which to write, and that's with a manual typewriter - a real writer's methodology. Last night, as my wife and I puffed contentedly on our pipes, sipping a 73 Claret and pounding away on our Olivettis, we discussed this very thing. Computers? A fad! They will nev...
by Bob Writer
Mon Aug 19, 2013 6:46 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir, When can I expect to receive my trophy? I entered this little contest of yours in April of last year. This waiting reminds of the week I spent in the trenches with dreadful dysentery. The corned beef was a little old. Still, it made me stronger, wiser, and cleansed my innards. Yours expect...
by Bob Writer
Sun May 05, 2013 3:21 pm
Forum: Publishing: The Business Of
Topic: Success!
Replies: 4045
Views: 874191

Re: Success!

Dear Sir, I am delighted to inform you of my first publication in more than a decade. I submitted 4,000 words to The Times, and my work has been accepted. The published version is thus: Bring back National Service. Dear Editor, It's time these namby-pamby long-haired louts joined a man's army and re...
by Bob Writer
Tue Apr 02, 2013 2:26 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir, How is it that this Farland chap, or Wolverine, (or whatever he calls himself this week) is able to keep his job? If other people in real jobs were this incompetent they'd have been sacked by now. I've submitted to this little contest of yours several times now and received nothing but rej...
by Bob Writer
Sat Jun 16, 2012 9:11 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

I'm not saying I did or did not, but I'm also not saying that Bobwriter (who I'm not going to say or not say is or is not my close friend) did or did not get one, either. Dear Sir, I've nothing against donkeys, in fact back in good old WW2 I rode one through the streets of Paris when it was liberat...
by Bob Writer
Sat Jun 16, 2012 8:49 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

I'm not saying I did or did not, but I'm also not saying that Bobwriter (who I'm not going to say or not say is or is not my close friend) did or did not get one, either. Dear Sir, I've nothing against donkeys, in fact back in good old WW2 I rode one through the streets of Paris when it was liberat...
by Bob Writer
Sun Jun 03, 2012 10:18 pm
Forum: The Contest - Quarterly Topics, and Other Items
Topic: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29
Replies: 4985
Views: 1039281

Re: Jibber Jabber - Q1 - 29

Dear Sir, The waiting was always the killer. During good old WW2, I spent six months waiting. They dressed me up in a dinner suit and I had to work in the officer’s mess, waiting tables. For a while there I was batman to a brigadier. I learned a great deal about what really happens in this man’s arm...
by Bob Writer
Thu Apr 12, 2012 5:57 pm
Forum: Publishing: The Business Of
Topic: Success!
Replies: 4045
Views: 874191

Re: Success!

Dear Sir, What’s with all this nonsense about awards for writing? My niece tells me that's all you lot can talk about at the moment. I hear enough yapping Americans when she comes home to visit with that Yank husband of hers. Never shuts up, that man. It's Obama this, and Nixon that, Stephanie Meyer...

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