An esoteric subject - first 2000

[Ishmael]

I have started a story based upon a rather specialist area of knowledge (of which I expect the average reader to be utterly and quite justifiably ignorant) and I am unsure whether the amount of background that I've supplied is inadequate, excessive or possibly quite unintelligible.

As usual with me I have only a vague outline of the story in my head, but it would be extremely helpful to know whether what I have written so far makes any sort of sense.

If anyone would care to take a look at it, I should be happy to offer a crit in exchange on a full or part story. Any brave volunteers please PM me.

[Henckel]

Hi Ishmael –

I tried to send this to you via PM, but it didn't appear to send. just got stuck in my outbox. anyway....

Sure, I’d be happy to take a look for you. Please feel free to email me directly to Christopher.henckel@gmail.com
In exchange, would you mind having a look over the first chapter of my current story? It is 2400.

Kind Regards
Christopher Henckel